I’m a gum chewer, yup, “major gum chewer.” I’m kind of sneaky about it at work; I lock it in my jaw almost like a tobacco chewer. I just like to know that like an old friend, its there if I need it.
As I’m leaving today and walking down the hallway I find a small piece stuck against my teeth that I didn’t know was there and I accidently swallow it. I wasn’t quite ready for this and began to choke a bit and totally loose control of my bladder. I don’t even have time to think about a “keigel.” Then I follow up with spitting “uncontrollably” my gum into my hand.
I proceed to open my hand expecting to see a remnant of my blue spearmint gum but no it’s a big old “loogie,” Jesus Christ, now I have wet under wear and gooey saliva in my hand. Welcome to my world…
I know my mother will read this and think, “Did this kid grow up in a barn”.
What can say, I find humor in the things we all go through but just don’t talk about.
My blog should be called “What we think, but do not say.”